HIM: Once we decided we wanted to try the club scene, finding out where to go was as easy as googling the words ‘sex club’ along with the name of the nearest big city. It turned out we had a few options, so we decided to go with the one we had actually heard of.
Every club we’ve been to since follows the same format, but it was all new to us that first night.
When we arrived at the front door we were informed that we had to purchase a membership. In case of a challenge, the club has to be able to prove to law enforcement that it is a private organization. That’s how they get around the local lewd conduct laws.
Once through those formalities, we entered what looked like almost any other nightclub, except a little smaller and a little lamer. Mix the apprehension of first timers like us with the over-eagerness of some of the experienced couples and you get a vibe strangely reminiscent of a middle school dance. We learned later on never to arrive too early, but it did give us an opportunity to do some people-watching, which we love.
Everyone’s body language tells at least part of the story of how they got there and what they hope to achieve. With a few couples, it was easy to tell that one was the convincer and one was the not-quite-convinced. We instinctively avoided those people.
HER: Another advantage to arriving early was the orientation tour for newbies. Along with three other slightly nervous couples, we were told that our night was going to be divided in half: we would start out on the dance floor and bar area like at any other club, and then at some point around midnight couples would start drifting off to the play area upstairs. On the second level, we were shown the co-ed locker room where we would leave our clothes behind before going any further.
Beyond the changing area, we were ushered past a warren of rooms of all descriptions: beds for two, beds for four, a large space with a padded floor that we dubbed ‘the pit’ and, of course, a dungeon-like space with restraints and paddles. Baskets of condoms and pump bottles of lube were placed at strategic points throughout. At the end of the tour, we went back downstairs to find that the dance floor was hopping.
HIM: While this looked like a typical night club, once the dancing started, everything changed. Hands went up tops and down pants. Skirts were pulled up over asses. One guy took his girl’s breasts out and started playing with them on the dance floor. Women took turns swinging from a stripper pole with various levels of skill (some were a little painful to watch), while another group started taking off each others’ clothes as they danced on the bar. We didn’t feel inhibited about staring because these people were definitely not trying to create a private moment. Overall, I thought the whole scene was pretty comfortable. The average age was early forties, with every decade from the 20s to the 60s represented. They tended to be attractive, but not in the super model sense. Above average soccer moms and dads, you could say.
HER: When we went out to dance, I half expected to be grabbed or propositioned, but we weren’t bothered at all. Couples generally stuck together. In fact, there was less unwelcome contact than at most regular night clubs I had been to. If there was any touching between couples, it was always initiated by the girls.
At around midnight, we went upstairs and wandered around a bit to see what was happening. The place was very dimly lit, but I opted to leave my bra and panties on for my comfort (which they allowed there, unlike some other places, where nudity is mandatory). We took a place against a half-wall overlooking the pit. The people in there were hardcore swappers. The most memorable scene involved a very young couple, probably in their early twenties. We had noticed them earlier on the dance floor, where they stood out for looking like the cute, conservative kids next door. The guy was nicely hung and, after spending some time with his girl, he drifted into having sex with an older woman. Meanwhile, his girl was being serviced by at least four people of both genders – one was eating her pussy, two were caressing her from either side, and a man had his cock in her mouth. It was surprisingly hot, but I had absolutely no desire to get closer. And no one asked us to. We were left completely alone.
HIM: On the way home, I remember feeling kind of non-plussed by the whole thing. It was interesting, but I didn’t think it would become a regular part of our sex lives. I just wasn’t comfortable enough to fully enjoy it, and I know you felt the same way.
HER: That night, I wondered why I would pay to go have sex somewhere where I know I probably won’t orgasm when I can have a better time at home for free? But I didn’t realize the real benefit until the next day: the sex was incredible! With a little distance from the reality of it, I was able to re-live the images. It was better than most fantasies, and way better than porn, because we had actually been there, and it was so fresh and vivid. That, for me, has been the thing that, a couple years later, keeps me coming back for more. The sex in the moment isn’t always the best, but the sex for days after is incredibly hot.
Liam & Kate are a married couple, very much in love, writing honestly and insightfully about their adventures in the world of non-monogamy.