HIM: Earlier this year I received an intriguing note from AJ, a regular reader of our blog: “I enjoyed your most recent post, and am familiar with the performance anxiety issue. Erectile dysfunction is never a problem when alone with my wife, but can rear its head in ‘lifestyle’ encounters. Traditional oral medications are…
Tag: monogamish
Strong Feelings: My Wife Finds a Girlfriend
HER: The English language does not have an adequate word for that emotional place between ‘like’ and ‘love’. You know, that vast territory between I like my neighbor and I love my husband. Colloquially, we talk about feeling butterflies, crushing on someone, catching feels, or being ‘twitterpated‘ (thanks to Bambi). You and I dealt with the…
Antigua Diaries: More Than Just Sex
HER: Back in February, we wrote an article that started as a review of our sexual bucket lists and ended with a somewhat shocking epiphany. What I wanted most, it turned out, was a girlfriend. A walking-down-the-streets-holding-hands, can’t-stop-thinking-about-you-when-we’re-apart kind of girlfriend. I had always been turned on by depictions of passionate lesbian relationships in movies,…
Desire Diaries: The Reunion Orgy
HER: Exactly one year, three months — and one pandemic — since our last trip to Desire, we were excited about returning for four days in June. We had been looking forward to a blissful reunion with Jay & Kay from the TCND (‘That Couple Next Door’) podcast and their friends from DC almost since…
Miami Diaries — Black N Kinky
In May 2021 we spoke at a lifestyle gathering in Miami called Podcast-A-Palooza. One hundred swinger couples from across North America gathered for three days of seminars and partying in South Beach. Unofficially, the event served as a kind of coming-out party after the privations of the Covid-19 pandemic. For us, it was four…
Miami Diaries — A Spontaneous Hotwife Experience
In May 2021 we spoke at a lifestyle gathering in Miami called Podcast-A-Palooza. One hundred swinger couples from across North America gathered for three days of seminars and partying on South Beach. Unofficially, the event served as a kind of coming out party after the privations of the Covid-19 pandemic. For us, it was the…
Friends With (So Many) Benefits
HER: One of the many beautiful things about our social swinger approach to the lifestyle is that we have made ‘friends with benefits’ all over the world. Last week, we were reminded of just how precious those friendships can be. Him and HerLiam & Kate are a married couple, very much in love, writing honestly…
No Pain, No Gain: Pushing Boundaries
HIM: Last weekend, we had our friends Kaitlyn & Colin over to our place for an overnight visit. They are a fascinating couple by any measure. For starters, they met because their spouses, Sam & Kassie, had sex with each other. Now, that’s not as shocking as it might sound, since both couples were in…
Should We Tell Our Kids We’re Swingers?
HIM: Last week, Belle and Adam of the ‘Swinging Outside the Lines‘ podcast released an amazing episode for their patrons, surely unparalleled in the short (but illustrious) history of lifestyle podcasts. They recorded a ‘live reveal’, where they informed their 17-year-old daughter of their non-monogamous relationship. It was compelling listening, but also a challenge to…
Dealing with Jealousy
HER: “We are jealous animals.” That’s how Dr Helen Fisher explained her belief that open marriages don’t work when she was interviewed on a Canadian radio documentary called ‘How to Survive the Dating Apocalypse’. She said she would never entertain the idea of an open relationship herself because she is just “too jealous.” Clearly, claiming…