HER: Our sexual adventures have lead us in a lot of different directions in the more than four years we’ve been together, but before we ever considered sex clubs or hedonistic vacations, we had a very organic FMF threesome (two females, one male) with a close friend.

HIM: I know a lot of guys spend half their waking lives plotting how to bring a second woman into their sex life, but I was lucky. I didn’t have to ask for it, because you came to our relationship with a friend who was good to go. Our first FMF threesome was my first threesome of any kind, ever, but it wasn’t yours.

HER: You’re welcome. It all started one night during my previous marriage. A close friend from high school, Melissa, would often come over to our place  for a drink after she finished work on a Friday night. Even as teenagers I had admired her incredible breasts, amazing hair, flawless skin, and sexy attitude. I had even fantasized about what it would be like to make her come.

That night, after downing a couple bottles of wine with her and my husband, she said that she had something she wanted to show me on the computer. We went upstairs to the spare bedroom (this is back when computers used to be anchored to one place) so she could show me some pictures of a man she had had a torrid affair with on a recent European vacation. As she told me about their adventures in minute detail, she became more and more turned on. After all that wine, I was really feeling it too. We had always been very affectionate with each other, but when she casually brushed the hair from my face, this time it felt completely different. She put her arms around me and kissed me. When she started rubbing my pussy through my pants,  I didn’t put up any resistance. It was pretty clear what she wanted. We found our way to the bed, stripped down to our underwear, masturbated beside each other and ended it there.

HIM: That’s an amazing story. I’ve actually jerked off thinking about that moment when you stepped over the border from friendship to something more with Melissa. How did you feel afterward? Was it awkward the next time you saw her?

HER: No, not awkward, but I felt a little guilty about doing it behind my husband’s back. I told her that I didn’t want to do anything else without his consent. So, after a very frank conversation with him about what had happened, he agreed to go with it if the opportunity for a threesome ever came up. The man wasn’t stupid!

Sure enough, the next time Melissa was over, and the wine was flowing, the three of us ended up in bed together. It turned out I wasn’t the only one who’d had naughty thoughts back in high school. She and I took our time releasing years of pent up sexual desire for each other. My husband got to watch and eventually go down on her, but he never actually fucked her. And that was the pattern for our three encounters. It reminded me a little of Friends when Ross’s ex-wife suggested a threesome with another woman and he ended up doing nothing but watching.  On the show, she soon announced she was a lesbian and left him.

Eventually, and maybe rightly, my husband took my enjoyment of my friend as a knock against him. It became (like almost every other good thing in our relationship) a source of conflict. The threesomes ended and, soon enough, so did the marriage.  I did consider trying to have a relationship with her after the split, but then you came along.

HIM: I remember meeting Melissa at an art opening when you and I were just getting to know each other, but I had no idea of your past. When you told me later that you had had sex with her, I almost passed out. Not only for the obvious reasons, but – holy fuck! – I was amazed that you could have sex with a close friend. I had always been a highly compartmentalized person and it astounded me that your sexuality was so seamlessly integrated with the rest of your life. I mean, the idea that you could share work gossip, then lick each other’s pussies, then go to an art opening together – it blew my mind! If I had read it in a book I would have rolled my eyes and thought, “Yeah, right – that doesn’t happen in real life.” No straight man could even remotely imagine an evening like that with a buddy.

HER: But most straight men could easily imagine watching his partner with another beautiful woman.

HIM: Um…no. Most straight men will fantasize about it, maybe, but not imagine it as something that might actually happen in real life.

Her: You certainly had no hesitation when I suggested that, if she was interested, we could continue our fun with you.

HIM: Oh, absolutely not – I wasn’t stupid either. It’s not often you get the feeling that fantasy is about to become reality. I remember that first night so clearly. The two of you were getting very cuddly as we talked about body issues, of all things. The conversation got more and more unguarded until we all had the same thought at the same time: “Let’s go upstairs!” Rather than jumping into bed, you filled up our big bathtub and the two of you got naked and jumped in. I just sat down on the toilet seat, still fully dressed. So there we were, continuing this very intimate conversation as you casually caressed each others’ bodies. I remember feeling very present, but also like I’d walked into a French movie, all at the same time.

HER: Eventually we started feeling water logged and I suggested we dry off and head to the bed. You quickly shed your clothes on the way over while I put on some music from the guy who has ever since provided the soundtrack for all of our threesomes, DJ Medicineman. I spread Melissa’s legs and went down on her while you remained on the fringes, just touching us both.

HIM: I certainly didn’t want to be that grabby, entitled guy.

HER: Which was definitely the right way to approach it. There was lots of caressing, kissing, and oral all around as the evening went on. But, as had always happened with my ex-husband, there was no actual intercourse between you and Melissa. That didn’t make it any less hot, though. At one point, Melissa did something I had often fantasized about: while you were fucking me from behind, she laid down beneath me and positioned her head between my legs so she could lick both my pussy and your cock as it slid in and out. The sensations were amazing, but the idea of what she was doing was even more of a turn on.

After a while, she shimmied out from under us and stood in front of me by the edge of the bed. Still on my hands and knees, my face was at the perfect level to lick her pussy. After a while she turned around and bent over so I could lick her ass while you fucked me with greater enthusiasm. Eventually, she drifted off to do her own thing.

HIM: Which was doing some kind of hippy dancing, as I remember it. I can still picture her silhouette in the bathroom light, but bizarrely enough, with all that stimulation, I don’t remember if any of us came that first time.

HER: Probably not. That seems to be our pattern with any new sexual experience: the distraction of the newness keeps us from being able to focus enough to get to orgasm. But that certainly didn’t take away from the fun.

HIM: Definitely not. I really liked everything about how it played out. It was the exact opposite of a porn movie experience. We were with someone we cared about, and everything unfolded from a genuine conversation. There was no posing, no fake moaning and groaning, no heroic finish. But it was still very hot. In fact, that’s why it was so hot.

HER: And that’s what has become my ideal: easy, comfortable, organic sexual play.

Him and Her

Liam & Kate are a married couple, very much in love, writing honestly and insightfully about their adventures in the world of non-monogamy.

www.themonogamishmarriage.com