Friends With (So Many) Benefits

HER: One of the many beautiful things about our social swinger approach to the lifestyle is that we have made ‘friends with benefits’ all over the world.  Last week, we were reminded of just how precious those friendships can be.

No Pain, No Gain: Pushing Boundaries

HIM: Last weekend, we had our friends Kaitlyn & Colin over to our place for an overnight visit. They are a fascinating couple by any measure. For starters, they met because their spouses, Sam & Kassie, had sex with each other. Now, that’s not as shocking as it might sound, since both couples were in…

Should We Tell Our Kids We’re Swingers?

HIM: Last week, Belle and Adam of the ‘Swinging Outside the Lines‘ podcast released an amazing episode for their patrons, surely unparalleled in the short (but illustrious) history of lifestyle podcasts. They recorded a ‘live reveal’, where they informed their 17-year-old daughter of their non-monogamous relationship. It was compelling listening, but also a challenge to…

Our Best Foursome Ever

HIM: This is fresh. It was just three hours ago that we said goodbye to our good friends Dominic and Maria at the downtown condo we rented for the weekend. On our way out, you said to them, “That was our best foursome ever.” But I think what you meant was, that was my best…

Desire Diaries: A Voyeur’s Paradise

  HIM: If someone asked me to list my sexual interests in order of preference, voyeurism wouldn’t be anywhere near the top. I’ve definitely had some good times watching other people have sex, but overall, I think I get more turned on by what’s going on inside my head than what others are doing around…

The Perfect On-Line Profile

HER: Ten years ago, people would cringe when they admitted they had met online (if they admitted to it at all). Today, it’s surprising when new couples actually meet the old fashioned way: in person, by accident. With so much of our lives lived on the internet, it makes sense that we would look for…

Dealing with Jealousy

HER: “We are jealous animals.” That’s how Dr Helen Fisher explained her belief that open marriages don’t work when she was interviewed on a Canadian radio documentary called ‘How to Survive the Dating Apocalypse’. She said she would never entertain the idea of an open relationship herself because she is just “too jealous.” Clearly, claiming…

Unleashing the Swinger Within

Like most people, I can tell when I’m being sold, and I push back instinctively. The key to my change of heart was that I never felt coerced or manipulated.

Hedo Diaries: Getting Ditched

One of the things I’ve enjoyed most about the lifestyle since we’ve been involved are the little moments of grace that happen without warning.

When life gets in the way: Anxiety and Sex

HER: F. Scott Fitzgerald famously said, “There are only the pursued, the pursuing, the busy, and the tired.” We’ve spent a lot of time being both the pursued and the pursuing in the sexual journey we’ve been on for the past few years, but these last six months have left us firmly in the last…