HER: One of the many beautiful things about our social swinger approach to the lifestyle is that we have made ‘friends with benefits’ all over the world. Last week, we were reminded of just how precious those friendships can be. Him and HerLiam & Kate are a married couple, very much in love, writing honestly…
Author: Him and Her
Liam & Kate are a married couple, very much in love, writing honestly and insightfully about their adventures in the world of non-monogamy.
No Pain, No Gain: Pushing Boundaries
HIM: Last weekend, we had our friends Kaitlyn & Colin over to our place for an overnight visit. They are a fascinating couple by any measure. For starters, they met because their spouses, Sam & Kassie, had sex with each other. Now, that’s not as shocking as it might sound, since both couples were in…
Should We Tell Our Kids We’re Swingers?
HIM: Last week, Belle and Adam of the ‘Swinging Outside the Lines‘ podcast released an amazing episode for their patrons, surely unparalleled in the short (but illustrious) history of lifestyle podcasts. They recorded a ‘live reveal’, where they informed their 17-year-old daughter of their non-monogamous relationship. It was compelling listening, but also a challenge to…
My Wife Wants A Girlfriend
HIM: We have done so many amazing things in our lifestyle adventure – threesomes, foursomes, orgies, and more. HER: And we’ve done them in fascinating places — at swinger parties, sex clubs, and lifestyle vacation resorts, here in Canada and in other countries around the world. HIM: We’ve been really lucky. I feel grateful…
Our Best Foursome Ever
HIM: This is fresh. It was just three hours ago that we said goodbye to our good friends Dominic and Maria at the downtown condo we rented for the weekend. On our way out, you said to them, “That was our best foursome ever.” But I think what you meant was, that was my best…
Just the Two of Us
HER: As people who have been non-monogamous from the beginning of our relationship, this period of enforced monogamy has been interesting. Sex between us has always been satisfying, but we’ve rarely had to work at keeping the spark alive. The lifestyle did that for us. HIM: Over the summer, since nearly everyone we knew was…
Responding to the Haters
HER: Last year, Lisa Ling did a feature on swingers for CNN’s This Is Life, using the 2019 Naughty in N’awlins lifestyle convention as the background for her inquiry. Having been there ourselves, we were curious to tune in. In the endless quest for ratings, it must be tempting to play up the most…
The Pants On/Pants Off Transition
HIM: In almost every lifestyle situation, there is a potentially awkward moment: the transition from ‘pants on’ fun to ‘pants off’ fun. After eight years, you’d think we’d have a formula worked out, but we don’t. We always seem to be making it up as we go along, as if every time is the first…
Our DIY Lifestyle Vacation
HER: One of the most frustrating consequences of the Covid-19 pandemic has been the shut down of non-essential travel. For us, that included the cancellation of lifestyle events like ‘Podcast-A-Palooza’ and ‘Naughty in ‘Nawlins’. Although resorts such as Desire and Hedonism have reopened, we felt that getting together with large numbers of strangers was…
Shame and Vulnerability
Sex is about vulnerability. We take off our clothes — our armour — and expose the most delicate parts of ourselves to each other. When we think of our earliest ancestors, living on the African savanna, having sex involved putting their very lives at risk.
Adding Bondage to the Mix
When you think about it, the whole BDSM scene is about consensual violence, a total oxymoron if ever there was one.
Sexy Spa Sunday
The most interesting toy by far was one that another couple brought: an electro play set. It had sticky pads attached to a device that delivered varying levels of voltage directly to the skin. We passed it around and most people tried it on their arms or some other low-risk body part. I was daring enough to pull down my yoga pants and try it on my clit.